Read the latest articles written by Mistress Vivian. Thoughts and ideas captured as written words.
A blog about Female Domination, Fetish, BDSM and kink in general seen through the beautiful eyes of Mistress Vivian.
MY THOUGHTS ON CERTAIN KINKS AND SEXUAL PRACTICES AND HOW MY VIEWS ON SOME OF THESE HAVE CHANGED THROUGHOUT THE YEARS...JOI (Jerk off instructions) -- My opinion on this has not changed, and I have tried to give this "fetish" a fighting chance on several occasions. Instructing you how to wank your dick does neither give me any kind of pleasure nor enough entertainment to be considering JOI as the sole theme of a session. To me it's simply jerking off and not a form of domination.
Sissies -- While many years ago I have enjoyed fun cam sessions with genuine sissies having a wardrobe even Barbie would envy, outfits, makeup, toys and proper behavior - these past few years have shown so-called "Sissies" becoming more ingenuine. Perhaps this new generation has picked up the word somewhere and think that's what a Dominant wants them to be. The men now naming themselves sissies typically don't have a cam and don't own a single piece of female clothing, not even something simple to start with: women's panties.
Sissification or feminisation is so much more than just yanking on your dick to the idea of it. It means you actually dress and act feminine in a way you can present yourself to the Dominant properly, you wear makeup, you worship large cocks (real or strap-ons) while your tiny useless penis is locked up. You are called by your new female name and practice to get sexual pleasure from sissygasms by stimulating your prostate with dildos (Yes, that means anal play!).
I've stopped playing with dolls a very long time ago, and can confirm I'd rather have a dirty male slut wearing stockings to play with than a pretty little sissy doll in a frilly outfit in need of being taught how to be feminine.
This fetish can go deeper to the point of sissies wearing diapers. Not for me! I am not taking care of babies or diapered sissy boys.
Cuckolding -- Sharing is caring, or so they say. Well, I am not one to share anything in that kind of way. This may be your kink, it isn't mine.
I have listened to stories, whether real or fantasy... The more I put my mind into it and try to picture the whole scenario for someone, or myself as these kinksters would like, the less enticing it gets. Perhaps I am old fashioned and prefer to have a partner all to myself. Perhaps I am in such a healthy fulfilling relationship that the thought of cuckolding never even came up.
So if this is your thing, good for you. Embrace it. I hope it gives you the kind of pleasure you need. My pleasure lies somewhere else.
..........................................................................................................
DISRESPECT TOWARDS WOMEN WORKING ONLINE...
For anyone unaware, cam models and women on social media face daily abuse by so-called "keyboard warriors". A keyboard warrior is someone who behaves aggressively in a chat room, or leaves rude comments on discussion boards, Facebook, Twitter etc. for the sole purpose of ranting, arguing, abusing and disrespecting anyone or anything, often for no apparent reason.
In real life, this person may be extremely shy or introvert with no intention to ever harm a living thing. The complete opposite to what you will encounter online where he feels safe behind a computer. A loser who - in the example of a cam model's chat room - may jump from room to room to insult, harass and abuse the models by writing disrespectful comments.
More often than not, this person will exit the chatroom immediately or shortly after posting such rude and abusive comments to not be confronted with any kind of response from a real person, thus displaying his true nature of being a coward.
New or young models in particular may take such rude comments to heart, making them feel insecure, cry, or go offline with their day ruined, unable to continue their work and make money because of the nonsense comment of a meaningless turd.
In the many years I have been working in this industry, I have seen many of these losers in my chat. Comments such as "you are fat", "you look like a tranny", "you're an old hag", "are you a man?" "you look bored", "get a real job", etc. cannot face a strong woman such as myself.
I can laugh it off - fully aware these comments have no meaning. The person has no meaning, most definitely not in my life, and perhaps not in anyone's life.
In fact, this may be the possible cause of becoming a keyboard warrior in the first place - being alone, rejected, not loved, not respected, fat, ugly, and not a man at all.
Remember: Comments define the author, not the person reading them.
If you encounter a model online who is looking sad or insecure, say something nice, send her a little gift, show your appreciation, make her feel special - because you know what? - SHE IS! She is special and unique in her own way and deserves to be treated with respect!
..........................................................................................................
DOMINATION WITH CLASS VS. TRASHY EURO DOMMES...
I will start of with this lovely email I have received from one of my long time subs:
"I guess you could say that this is a compliment, but I find myself looking at other "Mistresses" when you are not on and I just can't bring myself to enter their rooms. They just don't seem to excite me the way you do and I don't think they are as engaging as you are. I feel like why waste my time with them when the opportunity arrives and I can spend my time with you. I hope that makes sense. You are the BEST one on this site, no question."
I love receiving feedback like this! Knowing you've taken the time to show your appreciation and to tell me just how much you enjoy your time with me and chosing me as your sole Mistress.
I aim to be the best, the only you desire, the only you wish to please and submit to, the only you wish to share your secrets and your fetishes with.
I expect and deserve loyalty from my subs. I doubt your loyalty if you call me "the best" one day and visit another Domme to call her "the best" the next. If I see your feedback on another Mistress' page, especially when you choose to visit a Euro wannabe "Domme" and consider her "the best Mistress" truly makes me doubt your understanding of a true Domme. Perhaps then you're better off in the hands of a Euro "Domme", jacking off along to her middle finger and dildo masturbation. I have no difficulties letting you go.
If you consider Domination showing the middle finger and milking the clock while you call her "princess" as she shakes her ass, you're missing out on classy Domination. It's amazing to see who calls themselves "Mistress" recently. An online Mistress without class, fetish fashion sense or BDSM knowledge is just another amateur cam girl. Romanian and other European webcam studios are jumping on the "Mistress"-bandwagon because it appears to be "in" nowadays. Adding dark color interior, expensive thrones, heels, cuffs and whips do NOT turn a cam girl into a superior Dominant.
The term "Mistress" defines a WOMAN in a position of authority or CONTROL - NOT one who shakes her booty for tips, or uses dildos on herself for your sole entertainment.
Call yourself kinky, call yourself playful, call yourself slut or princess, but don't call yourself Mistress. Trashy Euro wannabe "Dommes" are the ones giving this title a bad name.
If you as a "sub" are looking for a cheap thrill or Mistress/slave roleplay fantasy, any Euro trash Domme will do for your 7 minutes of wanking.
However, if you are looking for a professional Domme, do your research! Know your desires, read profiles and reviews to find the right Dominant for you.
..........................................................................................................
THE LACK OF FEEDBACK ...
Everyone wants to be so social and part of a community, sharing tweets and facebook posts with friends and other followers, yet when it comes to leaving feedback for any kind of transaction many simply take it for granted and don't bother.
I have noticed a declining trend in feedbacks received even though the customer base increases constantly.
Your feedback is important, this applies to Ebay, or other shopping sites, the very same way as it does to Adult cam sites or clips stores. You make your buying decision based on others feedbacks. Do the same for the next customer, leave your feedback about your experience.
It's no hassle to whip out your dick and jack off but it's a hassle to rate and leave feedback when the show is finished?! Come on!
Your feedback and rating is a token of appreciation for the performer, your 'thank you'. If you don't tip, the least you can do is leave feedback. When you cannot use word of mouth (like you were not going to tell your best friend about your visit to your Mistress...), use the online feedback system.
Spreading the word about your favorite Mistress or Adult performer only takes a brief moment and helps others. Be social!
..........................................................................................................MONEY AS CURRENCY IN EXCHANGE FOR CERTAIN ACTS...
I have recently posted this on twitter but I feel it deserves a blog post to not be forgotten too soon:
Some of the guys' behavior in webcam chat is simply pathetic and I need to clarify a few things for those who don't understand what I do.
When you enter my domain I expect you to behave, treat me with respect, and follow my rules and commands without question or hesitation.
Just because you pay a certain amount of money to session with me, does not mean you are granted certain rights. If you consider the money to session with me a currency to get what *YOU* WANT, then you have completely lost focus on what you truly DESERVE.
If you continue to make certain requests "because you have spent x amount of money in x amount of years with me", I will lose interest in you. Your money is in no way a currency in exchange for certain acts you want me to perform. I am not your puppet, quite the opposite! I hold the strings and I pull them. What ever I may decide to perform or grant you to see, is simply that: My decision alone.
Remember: I don't need you. You need me! You need me to give your life meaning and some kind of pleasure as a reward for satisfying me. Satisfying me does NOT mean you get to "spread my legs", "take me from behind" or lick my "sweet pussy and ass til I cum all over your face". Who do you think you are to be even considering to get that close to my intimate parts, whether it be in your filthy mind or in reality?!
Understand my work as a Mistress, what I do and don't do. Stripping, nudity, performing any kind of sexual acts is NOT what I do. If that's what you are looking for, then your money as *currency* is well received with strippers, hookers or amateur cam girls.
..........................................................................................................
MY RECENT INTEREST IN HOODS/MASKS...
I have always loved my subs wearing masks and hoods, primarily latex. In my opinion, a latex sub is only complete with a tight hood. Though I didn't enjoy masking myself in the past, I have recently become fascinated by slipping on a tight rubber hood as well. The way it looks, the way it feels and the way it changes ones persona is amazing. A skin tight suit completed with a latex hood creates a fantastic fetish look.
The mere reason I didn't wear masks or hoods in the past years is the fact latex sometimes caused mild allergic reactions, primarily in the face and near mucus membranes. Due to wearing latex more often in the past years, my body has gradually cured itself and the allergy through hyposensitisation. (A warning though: This may not work for everyone. If you have an allergy with mild to severe allergy sypmtoms of any kind, not-specific to latex, you should always speak with your doctor first before starting any kind of treatment on your own.)
The important part is, I can now enjoy the look and feel of a full rubber hood in my sessions, and you get to worship a Mistress clad in tight latex from head to toe - truly an amazing sight.
..........................................................................................................
HOW TO STORE LATEX...
Most important is to store your latex garments away from any heat source and direct sunlight. UV light damages latex and will cause it to deteriorate eventually, getting dry, brittle and discolored.
Small pieces such as gloves, panties, stockings etc. are best stored lightly powder dusted (or - what I prefer - treated with Pjur Cult and stored in a zip loc bag. Pjur Cult will condition and shine your latex all in one step so your clothes will be ready to wear as soon as you pull them out of the bag. Try not to squeeze the zip bag too tight while trying to get all the air out. This isn't a piece of steak or chicken breast you're trying to freeze with as little air as possible left in the zip bag :-) Gently flatten the garment inside the bag and zip tight.
Larger pieces, i.e dresses and shirts should be stored on a clothes hanger inside a garment bag, away from sunlight and any direct heat source. Personally I prefer a thick untreated wooden hanger and black garment bags of breathable material, a plastic garment bag will work great as well. I choose black to keep the light out. You may prefer to actually see the garment and pick a clear bag. I simply hang a tag on the outside to know what's inside.
Some garments will have thin shoulder straps. DO NOT hang these pieces on a clothes hanger for an extended period of time. The weight of the garment will eventually stretch the straps causing them to tear. Such garments are best stored either on clip hangers upside down, or in large zip bags laid flat.
Keep colored and black latex separate. Especially white latex is prone to discolorations when mixed with other colors.
Personally I prefer to have every piece of my vast latex collection separate so it won't touch any other garment.
Latex care is easy once you get the hang of it. Taking care of your latex is part of the fun. Knowing you'll be getting it ready and polished for the next time you'll be slipping it on. The bathroom filled with the wonderful scent of clean latex just makes you want to slip it on again straight away.
..........................................................................................................
HOW TO CLEAN LATEX...
It's essential to wash latex right after you're done wearing/playing in it and to do it properly. Sweat and oils will harm your latex eventually causing it to deteriorate if not washed after each use. If it's an expensive high quality piece it deserves the extra care.
Washing latex is very different from washing your regular clothes. There are special latex cleaning solutions available. However, my many years of personal experience have shown it doesn't need any such special products. A simple soak in luke warm water with a tiny squirt of dish washing liquid will suffice. Use a plain dish washing liquid without any additives. Antibacterial or moisturizing dish washing liquid is NOT what you are looking for. Remember: You don't want to moisturize your hands but remove the dirt/sweat from your garment.
Soak the garment for a short while. Gently rub all the sides of the latex and move the garment around to remove any dirt. Do not rub the latex garment vigorously like you'd be trying to remove a tough stain on cotton. Also, there is no need to soak it for an extended amount of time.
As always when handling latex - careful with your fingernails or any sharp objects or jewelry!
After washing, rinse in clean water and hang to dry. This won't take long at all. You may also use a soft cloth or towel to soak up the water drops gently and the garment is ready to wear again right away.
Always make sure the garment is thoroughly dry before you store it.
Summary:
1) Soak your latex garment immediately after you've taken it off.
2) Use two plastic tubs or buckets, one to soak with dish washing liquid, the other for clean water to rinse.
3) Pick a plain dish washing liquid without additives.
4) NEVER wash latex clothing in the washer, neither put it into the dryer! It is always hand washed and hung to dry.Caring for your latex is easy. Once you get the hang of it, you'll always know what to do.
..........................................................................................................
MY LOVE FOR LATEX...
I am often asked why I love latex so much. I'll give you three good reasons:
1) LOOK: Latex looks beautiful - slick, glossy, tight, shiny...
2) FEEL: I love the way it feels - tight, sweaty, hot...
3) SMELL: The smell of a brand new piece of latex clothing is wonderful. Pure and simple FETISH at its finest. Pulling out a new latex outfit for the first time taking in the rubber scent is quite an intoxicating experience.You absolutely can't deny I look amazing in tight rubber hugging every of my spectacular curves. I consider it a second skin. The feeling of slipping it on my naked body, tight, slippery - the first moment it touches your skin... a cold sensation. Soon after it warms up to body temperature and it just feels natural.
It had all started with a pair of panties in my early teen years. In the meantime my collection has grown to endless pieces from head to toe, panties, bras, corsets, stockings, socks, shorts, skirts in all lengths, dresses, pants, tops, catsuit - you name it, I got it.
I consider Latex one of THE best and true Fetishes and I LOVE indulging in it.
..........................................................................................................
HOW TO WEAR LATEX...
So you've got yourself your first latex garment.Before you try and rush into it like any of the clothes you've known in the past, there's a few things to remember: Latex is fragile and can tear easily. Patience is the key! Remove any jewelry (rings, watches etc.) and assure your fingernails are neatly trimmed.
Depending on your preference, use powder, silicone lubricant or dressing aid such as Pjur Cult to achieve the garment to slide over your skin. This is very important when you take on stockings, socks or gloves. Other garments such as shirts or panties will usually slip on easier. Use powder or lube on the inside of the garment as well as on your body.
If powder is your preference, try whether you prefer talcum powder or corn starch. Corn starch has been related to promote latex allergy. As with any type of allergic reaction, such as rash, try another kind of dressing aid until you find the one that suits your needs.
Personally, I prefer Pjur Cult, as it is not only a dressing aid but will also condition the rubber garment to extend its life.
Don't tug or pull on the latex garment, dress with care. You may either wear a pair of cotton gloves to have a good grip on the garment, or slide your flat lubricated hand between the garment and your skin to adjust the garment until it is in place.
Now it's on to polishing. Polish with Skin Two Serum, available on Ebay. You want to achieve a high gloss surface so use enough silicone lube or latex polish to cover the whole garment. For indoor use I suggest using a liquid, outdoors you can use silicone spray but remember silicone is slippery. Watch your step!
You are ready to show off your high gloss latex garment to your Mistress.
..........................................................................................................
MY THOUGHTS ON WARDROBE CHANGES IN CAM SESSIONS...
With a fetish wardrobe as large as mine, you are always welcome to indulge in your favorite fetish with me, whether it be leather, latex or pvc/vinyl. In a cam session I love slipping on the fetish outfit of your choice.
However, you shouldn't by any means *expect* me to change whenever YOU feel like it. I don't rush into a whole new outfit, or even worse through several outfits in a 10 minute session simply because you cannot afford more time with me. If you are looking for a fashion show of my whole wardrobe or a large part of it, then you had better come prepared with enough money to spend.
My time online is precious and I carefully select the outfit I am going to wear, so *expecting* me to change into something completely different at the snap of your finger shouldn't be a given at all. I have encountered several of these. You may ask politely whether at that moment it is possible to change.
..........................................................................................................
MY THOUGHTS ON CEI AND HOW TO ACTUALLY DO IT...
The idea behind CEI (cum eating instructions) is exactly what it sounds like -- to be instructed on how to and when to eat the hot load of cum. Generally speaking, a nice idea. However, badly played out by the male species you encounter in an online chat room. For the simple fact that 95% of users never actually intended to eat their cum to begin with, instead with a simple mouse click on the "End session" button get out of this "sticky" situation.
Yet the idea to taste their cum for the very first time is somewhat of a thrill to them. Take into account that most users are in their mid 20s to 50s, thus speaking of "the very first time" is rather pathetic. Apparently a spoonful of semen is something to be scared of your entire life as a human male, or so it seems for the 95% of the male population I've encountered online.
If you think your cum tastes nasty (perhaps you've dared to dip your tongue in it) -- it's as simple as adjusting your diet. The taste will change from day to day. A simple rule of thumb: Stay away from red meats, asparagus and shellfish. Include light colored leafy greens, white meats and natural sugars in your diet. Eat lots of fruit, in particular pineapple. It'll make your cum taste mild and sweet. Drink plenty of water regularly.
If you follow these simple steps you have nothing to be scared of. Remember: semen isn't a waste product such as poo. Therefore, it isn't harmful to swallow your own cum. You wouldn't want to harm your girlfriend by making her swallow your cum, would you?! Exactly! No harm for her, no harm for you.
Semen is nearly 100% liquid protein, fully digestible, rich in nutrients and minerals such as zinc.
Speaking of zinc -- if you do want to achieve a larger load, make sure to swallow up on a zinc supplement regularly before swallowing your semen.
All it takes is a little courage - instead of being a disappointment to your Mistress be man enough to actually swallow your cum if that's what you are fantasizing about while jacking off.
..........................................................................................................
MY THOUGHTS ON MISTRESS/SLAVE ROLE PLAY ONLINE...
Honestly, for which true Dominant is "I've been a very very bad boy" a great conversation starter in an online chat room? Is a real Mistress going to jump up and dance with a cheap cat o'nine tail whip in her hand and reply "Ohhhhh, you've been such a VERY VERY BAAADDDD BOY!". Absolutely not!
This kind of talk is something for the bedroom to spice up your boring vanilla sex life while you have your girlfriend incorporate a whip and a pair of boots every now and then.
On the contrary, it's NOT something a TRUE Dominant is going to play out in her chat room while you're obviously just going to sit there jacking off thinking of her great tits in your mouth while she's riding your cock. Now that may be fine with every single Eastern European cam girl playing Mistress for the day.
However, I suggest you think twice about leaving a first impression when entering the chat room of a true Mistress. Whether you are priviledged enough to serve a Pro Domme or Lifestyle Domme online isn't in your hands. Understand she is offering her services online to those unfortunate TRUE submissives who cannot serve her in person, not a horny wanker looking for a cheap thrill. In her presence your position is that of a lowly servant -- Act accordingly!
Know the difference: Does it look like you've walked straight into a Russian webcam studio or have you entered the domain of a Professional?
Personally, I do not enjoy role play or costumes. Reason being, I don't slip into character. I am what I am. Dominant. Superior. Professional.
